What is your thought process when you wake up in the morning? Mine looks like this:
http://incredimazing.com/page/Bacon_Flowchart: Whoever made this peered into my soul.
Bacon’s awesomeness is self-evident, meaning its mere existence is enough proof it’s awesome. But its true power is unleashed when combined with other good foods. You see, bacon is a true superstar, and as such makes its teammates better, like Michael Jordan. This is better than a good food that doesn’t play well with others, like pop tarts, or Allen Iverson. So I got to thinking, bacon is so good at making other foods better, but has its deliciousness enhancing powers been fully explored? What foods could better utilize bacon for a fuller, more fulfilling eating experience?
Cheese
Bacon and cheese go together better than Arnold and 1 liners:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=64aJH2l_doY: I can’t wait for The Governator to come out
Virtually all foods with cheese can, and should, have bacon. Preferably melted, cheese offers a melty yin to bacon's crunchy yang, which helps to center one's Chi. This marriage of smoky goodness and creamy richness is no secret, but these two should be thought of as one entity, cheacon. I have a dream, when one day I can go to the grocery store and buy prepackaged cheacon. I have seen the mountain top, and it is delicious.
Hamburger/Sandwich
For centuries man has known of the impact bacon can have on a sandwich. Yet, I still feel it is being underutilized. I don’t know if a cheeseburger is even worthwhile without bacon, unless maybe it has sauteed mushrooms. It already has cheese, which can always be paired with bacon (see above). Whenever I’m eating a baconless sandwich I say to myself, “Self, what would make this sandwich better?” We all know the answer to that.
Here’s a sandwich recipe that is guaranteed to be delicious: Unstale bread, bacon, cheese, another meat (chicken, turkey, hamburger, more bacon), some sort of sauce. Bam! Flavor town.
http://carefulthought.files.wordpress.com/2007/04/bacon5.jpg: Bacon makes anything better, even bacon
There are literally trillions of comcastic combinations. Here are two that work for all time constraints and income brackets.
Bacon/cheddar/bbq sauce plus chicken breast or hamburger on pumpernickel
Bacon/Swiss (or havarti if you can handle nirvana)/ranch plus chicken breast or hamburger and pepper to taste on sourdough.
Excuse me, I have to go make both of these right now.
Tacos (or any Mexican food)
Those were delicious. Building from the example burgers have given, we see bacon and hamburger meat play well together. This doesn’t need any more explanation. Tortilla + cheese + meat + bacon + whatever the hell else is in Mexican food = best thing on any Mexican menu. I’m surprised the Mexicans dropped the ball on this.
Lasagna (or any Italian food)
For years I have wrestled with a way to incorporate bacon in one of the marvels of culinary science, lasagna. Whether crunchy or chewy, bacon’s texture does not go with lasagna’s consistency. I will continue to experiment, but let’s think about bacon’s use in past dishes in general. Some might say that real Italian food doesn’t use bacon (Neal Allen). This is a bold faced lie. Italians made their own bacon, pancetta. Take a sheet of bacon, throw on some pepper and other spices, then roll it up and slice it. Now you have pancetta. This stuff is great in red and white sauces, on pizza or in panini’s. Of course, if you don’t want to pay extra for a fancy name you can put some pepper on bacon and your back in the old country, a.k.a. flavor country.
Vegetables
Vegetables suck. Children know this instinctively, and must be tricked into eating them through various means of nefarious deception. One such way is using a dipping sauce like ranch, and we’ve already established that bacon and ranch both play for team awesome. Throwing in vegetables just adds health to the equation.
General Tso’s Chicken (or any Chinese food)
Ok, I know it’s getting a little crazy, but stay with me. Imagine some nice crispy bacon pieces in tso sauce. I bet bacon would go well with some Peiking duck. Think of bacon as savor sprinkles: just sprinkle some bacon pieces on any robust meal and you’ve just raised the overall awesomeness by 10%.
Seafood
Seafood is delicious, so it doesn’t need to be overpowered with bacon. However, bacon-wrapped scallops are the best Super Bowl snack according to some (http://www.realclearsports.com/blog/2008/01/rcs_favorites_super_bowl_snack_1.html), goes well in lobster bisque, and I think a little bacon sprinkled over shrimp or in butter sauce for lobster would do the soul good.
Indian Food
“They aren't allowed to use bacon, I think. But we can!” – Andrew MacDonald
There are actually several distinct types of curry, and I gotta believe all of them could use a hot bacon injection. There are a lot of exotic flavors used in Indian food which I know nothing about, but I do know something about the nature of bacon. India should put their nuclear program on hold and get their top minds on the bacon infusion equation. This could end the bloodshed in Kashmir…ok, maybe not, but it won’t make it worse…except Muslims don’t eat pork so it might. Looks like I’ll have to take care of this myself.
Hot Cinnamon Apple Dessert
Bacon has conquered breakfast and lunch and the dinner campaign is going well. Dessert is the final frontier, the undiscovered country. Recently I was introduced to candied bacon, which was quickly followed by singing angels. But bacon alone is not enough, so here is my theoretical bacon dessert: Some sort of apple cobbler type thing with hot apples and cinnamon, broken up graham crackers and pieces of maple bacon. It’s still a work in progress, but think of the possible ramifications. Chocolate, like bacon, makes other things better. If these two culinary powers can be combined the results might cause my head to explode. I am mentally preparing myself now for this edible super-force to avoid any cranium damage.
I feel like I accomplished something here. I talked about bacon enough to raise my cholesterol, I used the word awesome more than anyone since 1991, and I got one step closer to realizing my vision. That step was having a vision. Some day, and that day may never come, bacon will be included in all the afore mentioned foods. I call it Bacon Day, the holiest of all the Judeo-Christian festivals (hypothetically). If that day comes during my life I will rejoice, for all of the work that I may or may not have actually done will not be in vain, and I will know that the forces of bacon triumphed over evil. Knibb High Football rules!
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